Life

Sometimes I lay awake at night
Things zipping this way and that way in my mind
I dont know if anyone understands

I want to trust God to open my heart again.
To learn to love people again like he loves us.

it is a reality. its happening.

Somedays hurt can shut us down
completly make us not want to come out into the sunshine.
The darkness feels....
alot easier to live in. then to come outside.

I realize that I still want to hide inside myself.
For I feel it is safer sometimes

But to LOVE is to RISK

Somedays I just dont want to make that risk anymore.

Those who suffer much....

Loveth much.

I read that from a elisabeth elliot book.
Her husband died in the mission field from warrior natives
whom he was trying to reach with the gospel.
Years later she wrote that. she loves more than most people I have met
She has the most reason not to. Loss after loss
Yet she looks to the cross. to Jesus and the price he paid for us.

That was love. past himself. past what he felt. right towords the cross he walked
So that one day we could walk to him.

I am excited for today. It will be an amazing day. Because I trust him

Later peeps.